In Need of Your Care

It gets dark so early these days. It's kind of depressing. Light means the world to me. The lighter the better. I suppose that translates to my spiritual life, too. When we live near to The Light (Jesus) we are all the better for it. Do you ever have dark times in your spiritual life? Dark spiritual times for me equate with illness. Most other things I handle fairly well. Sickness and feeling close to Jesus do not equate in my brain or my heart. I'm not proud to admit that but it seems to be true over and over in my life. It started very young and while we have explored the cause of such, we can't put a finger on it.



My biggest effort today is to capture every thought and hand it to Jesus. NOT EASY. When ever I have a health issue, I go bananas. When I went to my cardiologist appointment mid November, everything looked great. He had me take a blood test as routine. I was called two days later that my kidney numbers were up and that I had to cut my diuretic in half and then have another blood test in three weeks. That I did feeling fully confident that my kidney numbers would have gone down. Not so, they went up more. That produced a panicy feeling. The advice was to cut all diuretic completely. Having been on that drug for eight years, taking it all away makes me very uneasy. I am to have another blood test the middle of next week. The time in between has left me frightened. I have all kinds of "what if" questions. When I have those kinds of questions my mind runs a million miles an hour.



SO, to all of you who share my life through this blog, I have a request. Please pray for relief from worry. Ask God to blanket me in His love and care. Also ask that my flesh will line up with His will and trust Him. I am open to your comfort and encouragement. If there is any issue in which my weaknesses show up it is health issues.